Celebrate Halloween with some old-style evangelical ad baculums

Nobody does the appeal to firey and brimstoney consequences like the fundies. Enjoy!


Via Pharyngula.

More below the fold . . .

Remember "Hell House," featured in The Root of All Evil?" . . .



In the spirit of Halloween and True Christianity (TM), here are a couple of excerpts from a documentary on the Hell House phenomenon:





Dramatised abortions, rapes and domestic violence. Let's just call this for what it is: Christian porn. Read more!

Keeping up with the Grodses

This post is chiefly inspired by sour grapes on my part: I pride myself on bringing you the latest in matters fundie/theocratic, and GrodsCorp up and steals the march on me. Twice.

Maybe I’m the last guy in Australia to know about this [nope, second last -- AV] but the Gloria Jeans coffee shop franchise is co-owned by two men with close links to the Pentecostal Hillsong Church. In addition to this, Gloria Jeans is a major corporate sponsor of Mercy Ministries which “is a non-profit organization for young women who face life-controlling issues such as eating disorders, self-harm, drug and alcohol addictions, depression and unplanned pregnancy.” Mercy Ministries is strongly anti-abortion and views “lesbianism as a sin that their residential program assists girls to ‘walk in freedom from.’”

It probably shouldn't come as much of a surprise that an icon of materialism (I'm not talking about the philosophical kind; I'm talking about the praise-Jesus-and-pass-the-remote-to-the-plasma-TV-in-my-theatre-room kind) such as Gloria Jeans has such strong links to Hillsong (which, like many evangelical churches, preaches the prosperity gospel) and the religious right.

Close to a decade ago, my sister was involved with Amway and invited me to a meeting. At the time I wasn't aware of its affiliations, but the loungeroom seminar did feel strangely like my sister had invited Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses into her house to give a presentation. (Later my parents, who (being parents) had attended a few of these meetings, described the atmosphere as "cultish.") The quasi-religious ambience was no accident. In the US, Amway (founded by Rick DeVos) has been a major supporter of conservative politics (see also this article by Bill Berkowitz), disgraced private armies, and religious right causes. From Scoop:

Eric is a good example of this kind of conversion. Before he came into Amway, politics had never been an issue with him, and he was not a deeply religious person. But he soon came to believe that he was dealing with people of great faith and integrity, in part because the tapes he was instructed to listen to.

Unbeknownst to Eric, an educational process had begun that would eventually alter and control nearly all of his values and beliefs. As part of that process, he was instructed to (1) attend choreographed Amway rallies where it delivers its message, often over 2 or three days; (2) read politically charged books; (3) listen to hours of politically slanted audiotapes and voicemail messages; and (4) pay large amounts of money to listen to Right Wing Religious and Republican spokespersons at seminars around the nation.

While attending these seminars, Eric began to learn about the supposed evils of liberalism and the Democratic Party and how the liberals wanted to take from the hardworking, honest people and give to the nonproductive members of society, who were only poor because they were lazy.

I've always thought of evangelicalism as one big pyramid scheme anyway.

OT: What do these two clips have in common?




Read more!

More unconvincing arguments for God: Pareidolia

Here's an interesting photo taken recently in Poland . . .



AND UNLESS YOU CAN PROVE OTHERWISE, THE DEFAULT EXPLANATION IS THAT POPE JOHN PAUL II HAS INCARNATED HIMSELF IN A BONFIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

While credulous theists the world over are once again basking in their own insipidness, a new voice of reason has emerged on the Australian political landscape. I mentioned it in passing on Sunday, but the Secular Party of Australia will be fielding candidates for the Senate in this year's federal election. Jen of Unsane and Safe fame will be running, which is good news, because I vote below the line. I wish her the best of luck: Ganbatte!, as they say in Japan.

As for the party's policies, there is very little that I disagree with, except this one: "We stand against . . . The wearing of religious attire in schools." As long as no one is compelled to wear religious attire, and as long as the wearing of such attire does not hinder the wearer's ability to participate in classroom activities, I don't see how it infringes anybody else's rights. (And the Party does claim, elsewhere on the site, to "believe that people should be free to indulge their beliefs, provided they do not infringe the rights of others.") Indeed, banning the wearing of religious garb, I believe, is just as anti-democratic as enforcing religious observance. (You might say that it amounts to the state overstepping the boundary between church and state.) I'd be interested to hear the thoughts of a representative of the Secular Party on this issue. Read more!

The Wonderful World of Magical Thinking XXVIII

The week in fundie . . .

1. Ann Coulter wants "Jews to be perfected." (Via Pharyngula)
2. Air America adds ex-evangelical Christian Dan Barker's Freethought Radio to its line-up, and FOX News screams "GODLESS PROGRAMMING!!" (Via Pharyngula)
3. Under Christian and Muslim pressure, UK teachers are becoming reluctant to teach evolution and are being urged to teach creationism.
4. Left Behind Games: Criticise our sad excuse for a computer game, and we'll sue! (Bartholomew's Notes on Religion)
5. Kent Hovind talks to God. And God talks back. Yessireebob!
6. US Department of Defence greenlights fundamentalist Christian proselytism in the military. (Dispatches from the Culture Wars)
7. Catch the Fire: Baby Jesus told Pastor Nalliah that he wants John Howard to win the election (Alan Matheson)

Ann Coulter: Anti-Semite
Read more!

PZ Myers' mutating genre meme

Here are the instructions:

The Pharyngula mutating genre meme

There are a set of questions below that are all of the form, "The best [subgenre] [medium] in [genre] is…". Copy the questions, and before answering them, you may modify them in a limited way, carrying out no more than two of these operations:

• You can leave them exactly as is.

• You can delete any one question.

• You can mutate either the genre, medium, or subgenre of any one question. For instance, you could change "The best time travel novel in SF/Fantasy is…" to "The best time travel novel in Westerns is…", or "The best time travel movie in SF/Fantasy is…", or "The best romance novel in SF/Fantasy is…".

• You can add a completely new question of your choice to the end of the list, as long as it is still in the form "The best [subgenre] [medium] in [genre] is…".

You must have at least one question in your set, or you've gone extinct, and you must be able to answer it yourself, or you're not viable.

Then answer your possibly mutant set of questions. Please do include a link back to the blog you got them from, to simplify tracing the ancestry, and include these instructions.

Finally, pass it along to any number of your fellow bloggers. Remember, though, your success as a Darwinian replicator is going to be measured by the propagation of your variants, which is going to be a function of both the interest your well-honed questions generate and the number of successful attempts at reproducing them.

My parent is: Pharyngula.

1. The best time travel novel in Magical Realism is…

The Island of the Day Before, by Umberto Eco.

2. The best romantic movie in historical fiction is…

Cold Mountain.

3. The best sexy song in industrial rock is…

Closer, by Nine Inch Nails

I shall attempt to disseminate my seed of a meme to:
Mikey Capital
Ninglun
The Thinker's Podium
A Churchless Faith
Unorthodox Atheism




Via Nullifidian, Kent Hovind getting pwned on the Infidel Guy. . .


Funny stuff. God himself now talks to this guy in his prison cell.

Read more!

The Wonderful World of Magical Thinking XXVII

The week in fundie . . .

1. Texas law, with the Orwellian title "Religious Viewpoints Antidiscrimination Act," allows evangelical students to proselytise to captive audiences at public school assemblies. (Alternet)
2. Fundies--of both the Protestant and Catholic varieties--call for the shutting down of a San Francisco gay and lesbian festival and for the boycott of sponsor Miller's. (As one liberal pastor observes, a conservative Christian boycott of alcohol--isn't that a little like Hindus boycotting beef?) (The Bay Area Reporter)
3. Archbishop declares he would refuse communion to Rudy Giuliani. (via Morons.org)
4. The Red Mass: where Catholic archbishops have the annual opportunity to instruct the members of the US Supreme Court on how to vote on constitutional matters. (via TheocracyWatch)
   
5. God-fearing evangelical Christians--default moral exemplars to us all--gay-bash an Indian man to death in Sacramento. Apparently "God has 'made an injection' of high numbers of anti-gay Slavic evangelicals into traditionally liberal West Coast cities," according to the host of a Russian-language anti-gay radio show in Sacramento. "'In those places where the disease is progressing, God made a divine penicillin,'" he said. The murderers belong to a Latvian Pentecostal church linked to anti-gay activist Scott Lively, who in the 90s wrote a book comparing gay rights activists to Nazis. (Bartholomew's Notes on Religion)
6. William Dembski: evil atheist materialist scientists unfairly try to rationalise away the existence of angels (which Dembski insists are as real as rocks and plants and animals) with reason and science and whatnot. Evil atheist materialist scientists!
   

Religion as Child Abuse
Read more!

The Wonderful World of Magical Thinking XXIV

The week in fundie:

1. God orders fundie to kill gay man. (via Pharyngula)
2. Fundies disrupt Hindu man praying in the Senate. (via Pharyngula)
3. Fundie mother tries to ban books from school library. (Friendly Atheist)
4. Trailer park bans HIV-positive 2-year old from swimming pool. (via Morons.org)
5. Former US Surgeon-General gagged by Bush administration. (via Morons.org)
   

(More of my thoughts about Jesus Camp over the fold . . .)

Watching the opening scenes of Jesus Camp, in which Pastor Becky Fisher whips up her pre-pubescent flock into a frenzy of flailing limbs and glossolalia, I had a passing thought. Imagine if these kids were encouraged to get passionate about the things that matter--politics, ethics, science, literature, philosophy--instead of rolling around the floor like mindless ululating idiots. Imagine if they could be encouraged to actually use their brains rather than surrendering them to fundamentalist dogma. That's the real travesty of this glimpse into the parallel universe that is Bible Belt USA: a generation of kids--smart kids--whose potential is being squandered in the cause of that politico-religious hybrid known as the Christian Right. A generation of kids whose intellectual development is being corrupted by the pseudoscientific and pseudohistorical claptrap that constitutes the Christian homeschooling curriculum. A generation of kids who are being raised to consider themselves, by virtue of their religious affiliation, as their nation's ruling class--who are urged by the likes of Fisher to Christianise the US, not by the use of reasoned debate and discussion, but by gradually seizing control of its institutions. I stand by my comment in the previous post. This is child abuse, pure and simple.

It would be easy to write this documentary off as a stereotypical representation of fundie America: creation science homeschooling, speaking in tongues, worshipping the image of President Bush, the family pledging allegiance to the Christian flag. It can't be real, can it?

But then you have only to consider the Dover ID case, the Creation Museum, the Left Behind videogame, "Paul Hill Days," the War on Harry Potter, "erototoxins," Paul Cameron, abstinence education, "fundagenics," the War on Science, Conservapedia, David Paskiewicz, Purity Balls, Idiot Pete, the War On Contraception, Christian Exodus, anti-Semitism, Pensacola Christian College . . . .

Jesus Camp, however disturbing, was not without its funny moments. In one scene, Fisher's young charges visit New Life Church, Colorado, to hear Pastor Ted Haggard preach against homosexuality. Read more!

Jesus Camp: one sentence review

This is child abuse.

Read more!

Jesus Camp

My girlfriend and I will be seeing it tomorrow night.



UPDATE: The whole thing (with Italian subtitles) is available on Google Video. Read more!

Friday the 13th Superstition Bash

This being Friday the 13th, the Harvard Secular Society is holding a "Superstition Bash":

"We're going to have the grand, four-foot mirror breaking under a ladder, in a circle of salt," said Christopher M. Kirchhoff '01, public relations director for HSS. "It's going to be a great time."

Members of the Lampoon, a semi-secret Bow Street organization which used to occasionally publish a so-called humor magazine, said yesterday that they were planning a prank for today.

"We have 13 black cats, and the plan right now is to glue them to trees in the Yard, but I can't tell you where--that would ruin it," said Matthew J.T. Murray '99, the Lampoon president.

"When people pass them, then they'll have bad luck. We hope we get a lot of people," Murray added.

I went to a Catholic high school, so of course I used to cover my homework diary and files with pentagrams and Satanic imagery (I mean, come on, it's tradition in Catholic schools). I guess I thought it would piss off the staff, but I doubt many of them really cared--except, perhaps, for the science teacher who told me I would be struck down by lightning for not believing in God. Anyway, I've been inspired to contribute to this "superstition bash" by having a bash at a particular piece of magical thinking I recall from my Catholic school days: the superstition that if you recite the Lord's Prayer backwards you will summon Satan . . .



(That ought to boost my emo readership significantly . . .)

Back in the 70s and 80s, the Religious Right accused various artists of "backmasking" subliminal Satanic messages into their songs in order the corrupt TEH CHILDREN. (Backmasking involves the backwards recording of a sound or message on a track that is meant to be played forwards.) Apparently if you play "Stairway to Heaven" backwards, you'll hear the message "Here's to my sweet Satan." While artists such as the Beatles have used backmasking as an audio effect, and while some have deliberately inserted Satanic messages into their music in order to piss off the reason-challenged, in most cases allegations of such backmasked evil messages can be sheeted home to pareidolia.

Here's Madonna apparently declaring her love for Satan on "Justify My Love."

And here's Britney Spears allegedly beckoning listeners to "Sleep with me--I'm not too young" on "Baby One More Time." (From Backmask Online)

Via Friendly Atheist. Read more!

Fun with spam

I received the following from a David Coube Larry in Abidjan, Cote d'Ivoire, and fuck me if it didn't half move me to tears. Even now, as I type these very words, I feel the lump rising in my throat . . .

Dearest Beloved

Assistance in migrating to your country for adoption and partnership in a wise investment in your country. I am David Coube Larry I would like you to permit me to apply through this medium for your co-operation and to secure an opportunity to Invest and do joint relationship business with you in your country. Sorry for the manner by which we crave your indulgence. Am from Ivory Coast. My parents are late. I'm 24years old and the only Son of my late parents MR and MRS COUBE LARRY, my late father was a highly reputable business merchant as (a cocoa dealer) who operated in the capital of Ivory Coast during his days. It is so sad to say that my late father was poisoned an he passed away mysteriously. Though his Sudden death was linked or rather suspected to have been masterminded by an uncle , who traveled with him at that time.

Now I've seen everything: an email scam based on the plot of Hamlet (or is it The Lion King?). Actually, that sounds like a brilliant idea for a meme: compose a scam email based on the plot of a play by Shakespeare. Any takers?

But only God knows the truth! My mother died when I was just 4 years old, and since then my father took me so special. Before the death of my father, He secretly called me an let me know that he has a sum of (US$6.000.000.00,(Six Million United States Dollars) left in a suspense account in a prime bank in London , My father told me that he put my name as his only Son as the next of kin on the day of the deposit.

A suspense account.

My father let me understand in the hospital that it was because of this wealth that he was poisoned, my father give me an advised that I should seek for a foreign partner in any country of my choice where i will have to transfer the total amount to the country of my choice and move on to the country and set up a good and wise investment.

I want to use your assistance to migrate into your country to continue my education and most importantly to help receive my inheritance fund involved (US$6.000.000.00,(Six Million United States Dollars) This money is an inheritance fund from my late father. I have all the necessary documents, I have suffered all form of humiliation both from my late father痴 families and the society in general. Consider an orphan with no assistance this is why I cry to you for help and assistance. Please contact me immediately you receive my mail for more details and explanation if possible.

This money is legitimately acquired by my late father from sales of cocoa-coffee and diamond dealings.

I will be looking forward to your prompt response. This is my Private E-mail:

Thanks and God bless

David .

OK, "David," explain this. You've just told us how you suffered all kinds of humiliations at the hands of your father, yet in paragraph 2 of your email you said that your father treated you "special." Your evil uncle Claudius and the whole kingdom of Denmark has taken a giant shit on you, so you complain, yet you'll happily trust your $6 million inheritance to a total fucking stranger!Who would you expect to be taken in by such tortured logic who isn't already selling Amway, practising Scientology or reading theology?

I know, I know. The whole point of these scam emails is to ensnare the gullible, the credulous and the insufferably stupid. But then how much more credulous or stupid are they than the family planning doctor in the UK who prescribed an exorcism for a patient during a routine examination (thanks Null), or the public primary school teacher who refused to allow a student to read from Harry Potter in class--on the grounds that "The Holy Bible gives express instruction against some of the practices contained in the book, and I therefore objected to the child reading this book to me," or the 67% of Americans who are either definitely certain or fairly certain that "God created human beings pretty much in their present form at one time within the last 10,000 years?" (Perhaps the "God Bless" is an indication that "David" knows his target audience well.)

I mean, consider Pascal's Wager--the suggestion, as Sam Harris describes it, "that religious believers are simply taking the wiser of two bets: if a believer is wrong about God, there is not much harm to him or to anyone else, and if he is right, he wins eternal happiness; if an atheist is wrong, however, he is destined for hell. Put this way, atheism seems the very picture of reckless stupidity." Like the scam email I received, there is the promise of great reward if one complies, and the threat of unpleasant consequences if one refuses to comply. (After all, you don't want to see a poor abandoned orphan deprived of his inheritance, do you?)

Pascal's Wager: the Nigerian email scam of religious apologetics.

P.S. While email scams can be good for a laugh, they also constitute fraud. If you find yourself on the receiving end, report the scammer to Scamwatch (if you are in Australia) or visit The 419 Coalition Website.

Read more!

Wonderful World of Magical Thinking XXIII

The week in fundie:

1. Malaysian woman, born to Muslim parents but raised as a Hindu by her grandmother, claims intimidation and mental torture during her imprisonment for renouncing Islam in favour of Hinduism.
   
2. Anglican Bishops blame floods on TEH GAY.
   
3. Jesus Camp screening at Perth's Revelation Film Festival 15/7/07
4. Religious Right protests promotion of Hindu professor to head of religion department at Lutheran-owned university
5. Bush administration flooded with graduates from a poorly-rated Christian fundamentalist law school
6. Kansas Education Board member unapologetic about her efforts to get Christianity into public schools through the back door
7. Yet another Christocrat Big Day Out: "American Vision"
8. Fundamentalism with a friendly face?
   

Read more!

Reed Braden vs. the Internet Squadristi

Reed Braden on why he removed several posts about Islam from his blog:

My series on Islam had already started and I could no longer take the pressure from several hundred death threats and at least a thousand emails considering my two posts critical of Islam. I deleted them.

I can deal with death threats, but not in that quantity.

I disagreed with some aspects of Reed's posts--basically I thought he was painting with too broad a brush--and I told him so in the comments.

What I cannot abide, however, is the use of intimidation to silence those who express views with which one disagrees. It is fascism pure and simple, and has no place in a civilised society.

On the other hand, fascism can be fun:
Read more!

In lieu of a short story: "Kissing Hank's Ass"

I came across this cheeky piece of counter-apologetics for the first time this morning, but I gather its been doing the rounds for a while. Click here for the PDF or read the whole thing below the fold.

From JHuger.com:

This morning there was a knock at my door. When I answered the door I found a well groomed, nicely dressed couple. The man spoke first:

John: "Hi! I'm John, and this is Mary."

Mary: "Hi! We're here to invite you to come kiss Hank's ass with us."

Me: "Pardon me?! What are you talking about? Who's Hank, and why would I want to kiss His ass?"

John: "If you kiss Hank's ass, He'll give you a million dollars; and if you don't, He'll kick the shit out of you."

Me: "What? Is this some sort of bizarre mob shake-down?"

John: "Hank is a billionaire philanthropist. Hank built this town. Hank owns this town. He can do whatever He wants, and what He wants is to give you a million dollars, but He can't until you kiss His ass."

Me: "That doesn't make any sense. Why..."

Mary: "Who are you to question Hank's gift? Don't you want a million dollars? Isn't it worth a little kiss on the ass?"

Me: "Well maybe, if it's legit, but..."

John: "Then come kiss Hank's ass with us."

Me: "Do you kiss Hank's ass often?"

Mary: "Oh yes, all the time..."

Me: "And has He given you a million dollars?"

John: "Well no. You don't actually get the money until you leave town."

Me: "So why don't you just leave town now?"

Mary: "You can't leave until Hank tells you to, or you don't get the money, and He kicks the shit out of you."

Me: "Do you know anyone who kissed Hank's ass, left town, and got the million dollars?"

John: "My mother kissed Hank's ass for years. She left town last year, and I'm sure she got the money."

Me: "Haven't you talked to her since then?"

John: "Of course not, Hank doesn't allow it."

Me: "So what makes you think He'll actually give you the money if you've never talked to anyone who got the money?"

Mary: "Well, He gives you a little bit before you leave. Maybe you'll get a raise, maybe you'll win a small lotto, maybe you'll just find a twenty-dollar bill on the street."

Me: "What's that got to do with Hank?"

John: "Hank has certain 'connections.'"

Me: "I'm sorry, but this sounds like some sort of bizarre con game."

John: "But it's a million dollars, can you really take the chance? And remember, if you don't kiss Hank's ass He'll kick the shit out of you."

Me: "Maybe if I could see Hank, talk to Him, get the details straight from Him..."

Mary: "No one sees Hank, no one talks to Hank."

Me: "Then how do you kiss His ass?"

John: "Sometimes we just blow Him a kiss, and think of His ass. Other times we kiss Karl's ass, and he passes it on."

Me: "Who's Karl?"

Mary: "A friend of ours. He's the one who taught us all about kissing Hank's ass. All we had to do was take him out to dinner a few times."

Me: "And you just took his word for it when he said there was a Hank, that Hank wanted you to kiss His ass, and that Hank would reward you?"

John: "Oh no! Karl has a letter he got from Hank years ago explaining the whole thing. Here's a copy; see for yourself."

From the Desk of Karl

1. Kiss Hank's ass and He'll give you a million dollars when you leave town.
2. Use alcohol in moderation.
3. Kick the shit out of people who aren't like you.
4. Eat right.
5. Hank dictated this list Himself.
6. The moon is made of green cheese.
7. Everything Hank says is right.
8. Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.
9. Don't use alcohol.
10. Eat your wieners on buns, no condiments.
11. Kiss Hank's ass or He'll kick the shit out of you.

Me: "This appears to be written on Karl's letterhead."

Mary: "Hank didn't have any paper."

Me: "I have a hunch that if we checked we'd find this is Karl's handwriting."

John: "Of course, Hank dictated it."

Me: "I thought you said no one gets to see Hank?"

Mary: "Not now, but years ago He would talk to some people."

Me: "I thought you said He was a philanthropist. What sort of philanthropist kicks the shit out of people just because they're different?"

Mary: "It's what Hank wants, and Hank's always right."

Me: "How do you figure that?"

Mary: "Item 7 says 'Everything Hank says is right.' That's good enough for me!"

Me: "Maybe your friend Karl just made the whole thing up."

John: "No way! Item 5 says 'Hank dictated this list himself.' Besides, item 2 says 'Use alcohol in moderation,' Item 4 says 'Eat right,' and item 8 says 'Wash your hands after going to the bathroom.' Everyone knows those things are right, so the rest must be true, too."

Me: "But 9 says 'Don't use alcohol.' which doesn't quite go with item 2, and 6 says 'The moon is made of green cheese,' which is just plain wrong."

John: "There's no contradiction between 9 and 2, 9 just clarifies 2. As far as 6 goes, you've never been to the moon, so you can't say for sure."

Me: "Scientists have pretty firmly established that the moon is made of rock..."

Mary: "But they don't know if the rock came from the Earth, or from out of space, so it could just as easily be green cheese."

Me: "I'm not really an expert, but I think the theory that the Moon was somehow 'captured' by the Earth has been discounted*. Besides, not knowing where the rock came from doesn't make it cheese."

John: "Ha! You just admitted that scientists make mistakes, but we know Hank is always right!"

Me: "We do?"

Mary: "Of course we do, Item 7 says so."

Me: "You're saying Hank's always right because the list says so, the list is right because Hank dictated it, and we know that Hank dictated it because the list says so. That's circular logic, no different than saying 'Hank's right because He says He's right.'"

John: "Now you're getting it! It's so rewarding to see someone come around to Hank's way of thinking."

Me: "But...oh, never mind. What's the deal with wieners?"

Mary: She blushes.

John: "Wieners, in buns, no condiments. It's Hank's way. Anything else is wrong."

Me: "What if I don't have a bun?"

John: "No bun, no wiener. A wiener without a bun is wrong."

Me: "No relish? No Mustard?"

Mary: She looks positively stricken.

John: He's shouting. "There's no need for such language! Condiments of any kind are wrong!"

Me: "So a big pile of sauerkraut with some wieners chopped up in it would be out of the question?"

Mary: Sticks her fingers in her ears."I am not listening to this. La la la, la la, la la la."

John: "That's disgusting. Only some sort of evil deviant would eat that..."

Me: "It's good! I eat it all the time."

Mary: She faints.

John: He catches Mary. "Well, if I'd known you were one of those I wouldn't have wasted my time. When Hank kicks the shit out of you I'll be there, counting my money and laughing. I'll kiss Hank's ass for you, you bunless cut-wienered kraut-eater."

With this, John dragged Mary to their waiting car, and sped off.

Read more!

The Wonderful World of Magical Thinking XXII

(Blogswarm: see below fold)

The week in fundie . . .

1. Alabama Governor proclaims a week of prayer for rain. (A tactic which has worked so well for John Howard.) (Via Pharyngula)
2. C of E bishop blames floods on TEH GAY. (Nullifidian)
3. Islamic nutjob blames recent thwarted terrorist attacks on the Salman Rushdie knighting. "Is Britain longing for Al Qaeda's bombings?" You fucking tool! (Dispatches From The Culture Wars)
4. Rightwing creationist nutjob Ann Coulter gets smacked down on national television to thunderous applause. (Via Morons.org)
5. Christian Zionist nutjob: Tony Blair is not necessarily the antichrist. "Many prophecy experts believe that a future pope will be the false prophet." (Bartholomew's Notes on Religion)
6. Christian fundamentalist nutjobs are planning a series of "Paul Hill Days" in honour of the man who in 1994 assassinated a doctor and his escort outside an abortion clinic. Planned events include a re-enactment of the shooting. (Talk2Action)
   

On the subject of theocrats, another Blog Against Theocracy blogswarm has been planned for July 1-4, 2007. Here's what to do:

1. Post to your blog about the separation of church and state. If you want to point your readers to something they can DO about the religious right, send them to the First Freedom First website and ask them to sign the petition. First Freedom First is not a sponsor of this blogswarm, but they have been a very very helpful resource, and Blog against Theocracy would like to return the favor. You may wish to tag your post "Blog Against Theocracy."

2. send an email to

blogagainsttheocracy.july07 AT blogger DOT com

The SUBJECT LINE of your email will be the NAME of your blog. I would type for my subject, "Blue Gal". Don't use all caps or any extra lines. It won't get picked up.

The BODY of your email should have ONE thing in it: The url for your post. Blogger will turn this into a link automatically. Make sure you post the full url, including the http, etc.

I'm sorry, but that's all you're allowed to email. Longer posts will be truncated, and if they're not, BAT staff will edit them. We have to be fair to everyone participating. We'll also be watching for spam and deleting that as it arrives, so don't feel you have to email me if you see any violations or spam on the site, we'll get to it.

I've tested this system and the biggest problem is getting the darn email address correct. It's AT blogger DOT com not AT gmail DOT com. And make sure you have a period between the blogagainsttheocracy and the july07, and that you spell theocracy correctly. (even I screwed up in this post. Be aware it's july07 not jul07. See?)

You may email blogagainsttheocracy AT gmail DOT com if you have any questions or problems.

Read more!

Australian idiocracy: Ninemsn polls

One of the more obvious signs that the idiots are taking over the asylum is the increasing tendency to confuse fact with opinion, as the current NineMSN poll shown above demonstrates. If you can't make it out, it reads: "Are young Australian Muslims vulnerable to being radicalised?" As the focus of a research paper or conference it makes perfect sense: there's a problem to be investigated, data to be collected, arguments to be advanced and results to be subjected to the scrutiny of one's peers. But what light can be shed on this topic by the kneejerk response of your average punter signing out of Hotmail? If the answer is "none," then what purpose is served by such a poll in the first place? They might as well have a poll on whether Europa features a liquid ocean beneath its icy crust.

This reminds me of former Education Minister Brendan Nelson's flirtation with the teaching of intelligent design in schools, on the grounds that "it should be taught in schools alongside evolution if that is the wish of parents." In other words, in 2005 the Federal Government believed that the religious opinions of parents should determine what gets taught as fact in a science classroom. Welcome to idiocracy. Read more!

Degayifying the Moskva

Orthodox Christian Russians were working tirelessly last Sunday to cleanse the Moskva River's sparkling waters of TEH GAY, after a dirty gay cruise vessel full of dirty gays trailed megalitres of santorum in its wake the previous evening.

Participants hired a ship and decorated it with church banners, icons, Russian imperial flags and their motto, "We are Russian, God is with us."

"Our great Orthodox capital is in spiritual vacuum and experiences ideological aggression from the West. So our aim was to demonstrate that the Russian people's spiritual and moral ideals are alive and will be so forever," Yury Ageschev, coordinator of the Union of Orthodox Brotherhoods, told Interfax.

He said one of the action's aims was "to purge the Moskva River after a large group of gays, who hired a similar ship to have a party going the same route last night."

On a more serious note, this follows a plan by Christians to conduct anti-homosexual pogroms in a Moscow park popular as a meeting place for gays and lesbians.

YouTube: Christians and homophobia
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The Wonderful World of Magical Thinking XXI

The week in fundie:

1. The Religious Right post-Falwell. (Americans United for the Separation of Church and State)
2. A library in South Carolina has been forced to cancel its summer programs after receiving threats and accusations that it was "promoting witchcraft." (Via Pharyngula)
   
3. Lesbians kicked off a bus for for kissing. (Via Morons.org)
4. Queensland National MP Barnaby Joyce: "If Christian people do not put their view forward that Australia is a Christian state, then within a short period of time, [. . .] another religion might fill the vacuum." (Via Unbelief.org)
5. An Italian village has opened a criminal investigation into the film version of The Da Vinci Code, in response to complaints by local clergy. (Dispatches from the Culture Wars)
   
6. The Exclusive Brethren cult, which bans sex ed and ICT in its own schools, is planning to sponsor one of the UK's publicly-funded "faith schools." (Bartholomew's Notes on Religion)
7. Study: social dysfunction higher in America's Jesus states. (Dispatches from the Culture Wars)
   

Bill Maher on Jesus Camp Read more!

On Pakistan's ability to get its priorities in order

This is Waziristan, a northern province of Pakistan. It was from here that the Taliban swept into Afghanistan, establishing in the late 90s one of the most savage and despotic faith-based regimes ever known. To this day it remains a Taliban and Al-Qaeda stronghold.


This is Salman Rushdie, an Anglo-Indian novelist who in 1989 was sentenced to death in absentia by the Iranian Ayatollah Khomeini, in response to the publication of The Satanic Verses which contained references to Mohammed which many Muslims deemed to be blasphemous. As a result, Rushdie went into hiding for nine years--while several others associated with the novel's publication were either murdered, assaulted or threatened--and to this day Iran's religious authorities refuse to lift the fatwa that was placed on him.

Now, if you were a Muslim and a member of the Pakistani government, which of the two would you consider a bigger enemy of Islam and more worthy of your condemnation: (a) a bunch of bloodthirsty religious fanatics who like to slaughter innocent people in the name of their faith, or (b) a British novelist who once wrote a book containing an irreverent depiction of Mohammed? Which of the two does more damage to the image of Islam?

Yeah. Me too.

But the Pakistani government doesn't see it that way, given its outrage over Britain's decision to award Rushdie a knighthood. Condemning the British government for its "insensitivity," Pakistan is demanding that the knighthood be revoked. According to the Foreign Ministry, "this decision can unnecessarily incite religious feelings [. . .] Rushdie has been a controversial figure who is known less for his contribution to literature and more for hurting the feelings of Muslims." (Cue the world's smallest violin.) The Minister for Religious Affairs warns that "such an award can provoke suicide attacks." Got that? If more innocent people are murdered because certain faith-heads have so completely lost the will to behave rationally, blame Rushdie.

Seriously, guys: if you don't like Rushdie, don't read his books. And don't take his knighthood personally--the notion that it's intended to be an insult to Muslims is preposterous. In the meantime, you have a very big backyard to clean up, and perhaps you should focus your energies on that.

More at Ninglun's.
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Bush nominates degayification advocate as US Surgeon-General

Australia doesn't really have an equivalent of the US Surgeon-General (technically, the closest equivalent is the Chief Medical Officer). He or she is the unofficial public face of health in the US, and is generally seen as a respected and authoritative advocate of public health education and healthy living. Naturally, the Christian Right would regard getting one of their own into this position as a major coup in its quest to Talibanise America.

As the disastrous experiment with abstinence-only sex education has demonstrated (an experiment destined to continue thanks to a decision by lily-livered Democrats to increase funding for such programmes), the fundagelicals don't do health science well. But what do they care?--they're more interested in saving souls than lives, and they're not about to let reality get in the way of their Bronze Age agenda.

Regarding the office of Surgeon-General, the faith-heads have had previous success: in 1994 they forced the resignation of Jocelyn Elders after she dared to suggest the promotion of so benign an activity as masturbation as an alternative to riskier sexual practices--despite the fact that masturbation carries no harmful side effects--expect possibly chafing. (Indeed, frequent ejaculation has been found to reduce the risk of prostate cancer in men, but I guess Jesus wants you to get prostate cancer.)

But the big pay-off for the Religious Right would be to manoeuvre a kool-aid-sipping fundagelical into the position of Surgeon-General itself. And now they have a sniff of victory, thanks to the Bush administration's nomination to the post of James Holsinger, a Paul Cameron-class homophobe:

James Holsinger, President George W. Bush's nominee for Surgeon General, has a dark view of homosexuals. In a 1991 paper, Holsinger describes homosexual sex in sickeningly lurid language. "Fist fornication," "sphincter injuries," "lacerations," "perforations" and "deaths seen in connection with anal eroticism," are some of the terms Holsinger concocted to describe acts with which he suggests at least medical familiarity (a case of participant observation, perhaps?). At the same paper, Holsinger puzzlingly issues no warnings about the dangers of heterosexual sex in his paper. To him, only "anal eroticism" is a health peril.

As the Alternet article points out, what is most worrying about this nomination is not so much Holsinger's bigotry as his support for "ex-gay therapy." In other words, the individual who the Bush administration believes is best qualified to give the American public advice on healthy living is someone who believes homosexuality is both a "lifestyle choice" and a "disease" that can be "cured." Moreover, the nomination is a tacit endorsement of a therapy discredited by the American Medical Association, the American Psychological Association and other mainstream medical organizations. The American Psychiatric Association maintains that there is "no scientific evidence that reparative or conversion therapy is effective in changing a person's sexual orientation;" there is evidence, however, that ex-gay therapy can have harmful effects, including "depression, anxiety, and self-destructive behavior, since therapist alignment with societal prejudices against homosexuality may reinforce self-hatred already experienced by a patient."

Hopefully, US senators will give this snake-oil salesman the short shrift he deserves.
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